A Tribute to Susan Rohde!

This is perhaps one of the saddest stories that we simply cannot dismiss. There are very important reasons why this witness was dismissed by the judge in the State Vs Jason Rohde case in South Africa, but this is MY personal opinion that this witness came to court to give a comprehensive appraisal of the person that no longer walks among us: Susan Rohde. Firstly, my heart goes out to her three beautiful gorgeous daughters, may God wrap you all in His love, protection and guidance. The confusion, loss and general state of misery is beyond our comprehension, basically there are no words to sum up how all three of you are coming to terms with the loss of your mom. Whatever you discover and learn, never forget she loved you and you are loved, by both your parents and by so many others, may love find you, surround you and never let you go. This trial has opened my eyes to how ironic life is, what we want and what we get is subjective and judgment and condemnation comes fast and furious. 
     The Expert witness of the Defendant was dismissed by the judge, but not before she delivered valuable insight into the character of Susan Rohde and this is Susan's story! Yes, Jason's life is on trial here, but Susan's life is over and before we all forget about her, she has a few lessons for all of us. So this is what I learned from listening and reading and watching what I want to commit to paper, this is my lessons from all of this. 

Susan was an intensely private person. She wanted the world to see the perfect family, and this was important to her. Now, here we are and everything that she held dear and everything she wanted hidden is common knowledge and splashed all over the net. From this, I understand that it is important to find a true, one true friend and take them into our confidence and talk, share and seek solutions.                 Friends are important, not as social networking or contacts, but as support structures. We need support. We cannot get by without help or assistance, good friends are what get us through tough times! Then never make a man your whole entire life. Don't build your life around a man. Love him. Cherish him. But be your own person. This is key from all of this. This wonderful, beautiful, gorgeous woman married her first serious boyfriend and she built a life around him. He became her world. Love myself enough to be able to walk away when someone no longer loves or treats me with the respect and love I deserve.        Know myself and know what it is I want from a relationship. 
 Trust and doctors. Why would we seek help, especially mental help when we don't truly want the answers to our problems? Doctors, how do you counsel your "patients" but don't truly care about their well being? You taking money, you living, feeding yourself and have a lifestyle because of their pain and you don't care? Her marriage counselor did express deep anxiety and concern and did reach out to a psychiatrist, but not Susan's clinical psychologist? Had the two collaborated, perhaps, just perhaps Susan would be here today. Caring about your patients! Why don't you care? We make these appointments, we walk into offices and we leave armed with a prescription, but seldom do we feel as though we matter and this has got to change! I had a session or two with a psychologist and she cared! She called me, sent me messages, and I have no doubt that she would have done everything in her power to assist me, had the circumstances warranted this. We all have something to learn from Susan's life. We cannot dismiss this lady without paying attention to her life. There is not one person alive and living that is not challenged, stressed and facing decisions that will hurt and implicate lives of others. There can be no judgment and no condemnation, none of us are perfect. We are all living and learning and this is Susan's gift to us, listen and learn and become! I look at her picture and my eyes take in the beauty and there is nothing inside me that understands how she committed suicide. This beautiful woman had every right and every reason to walk away from a marriage where love had been replaced with compliance, acceptance and basic taking each other for granted. It's hard to stay in love, but it's awesome when we get to fall in love with each other all over again and this happened with my hubby and myself. The road is long, but every day we find each other in new ways and we adjust and appreciate, argue and compromise, we continually growing as people and we have needs that change and we grow as people, as a couple, but I am my own person as he is his own. I don't ever want to forget this. There is sorrow when a marriage breaks up, but this is part of growth, loving and not being loved is crushing. It's devastating, how could someone so beautiful, think she would not survive a divorce? Such is the mind, body and soul and these are the personal fears and feelings that belonged to a woman that must leave us with these messages. Have a friend and cherish that friend. Hold our doctors accountable. Depression is not a modern day "yuppy" illness.  Depression is real. Mental illness is real. Emotional trauma is real. Get help and don't pretend all is well, why we are screaming and dying inside. We are as people, unique, desirable and loving, we bring to this world the magic of our smile and the warmth that comes from our hugs, we are required and we are worthy of living and having this life experience. This is our experience and no one has the right to rob us of this experience. Stop waiting for Heaven to come and get us and learn to be alive, and live! heaven will get here, but in the meantime be nice! Tolerate. Accept each other. Love each other and be Kind to each other. We are the resistance and the resistance is love. 
I don't know what happened in that hotel room, and though I never met this woman, she has left me with a few lasting messages. 
On a personal note: to the cop that stole her diary, this is perhaps the lowest of actions that you could ever have performed, not only was her suitcase, vanity case along with her diary stolen from police evidence, but her diary? How could anyone steal a diary? This lady has three young girls that needed something of their mom. My father died of a heart attack and my aunt gave me a jersey he loved to wear, this jersey is a personal treasure of mine. You stole personal possessions that would have meant perhaps everything to her daughters, how could you? 
     We see the level of hate and disrespect we have for each other on social media, but we don't have to respond in this manner. We have a choice and we have decisions that need to be made and we need to start making the right decisions based on answering one question:
Can I look myself in the mirror, having done this? 

      Rest in peace Susan! A life gone but never forgotten!